Dear Jesus, You Owe Me an Apology (and Maybe a Refund)

Do you understand how much that shame cost me, and you think you can just take it, for free?

I demand a refund


Okay, Big Guy, I know you mean well and all that jazz about "unconditional love" and "dying for my sins" is touching, but frankly, I'm a little ticked off. See, this whole "taking away my shame" thing? Not cool. Especially since you apparently did it before I was even born.

I mean, come on! That's like stealing candy from a baby who hasn't even figured out how to reach for the candy yet. Talk about a low blow! Where's the justice in that? I didn't even get a chance to enjoy my shame, to really wallow in it, cultivate it, maybe even write a bestselling memoir about it.

And here's the real kicker: you took away my shame, but left me with all the consequences of acting like I was still ashamed! Years of self-sabotage, bad relationships, and questionable fashion choices (those 80s shoulder pads? Whose idea was that?!). It's like you set me up to fail!

Now, I know what you're thinking: "But Graham, I died for your sins! You're free!" Yeah, yeah, I've heard the spiel. But here's the thing, J-man, you finished the work 2000 years ago, but apparently forgot to tell me about it. So, while you were up there high-fiving angels, I was down here wrestling with guilt and inadequacy. Not exactly a fair fight, is it?

Turns out, this whole salvation thing is like a gift card you got me for my birthday, but forgot to give me the activation code. It just sat there, useless, while I was out here paying full price for my mistakes.

So, here's the deal: I'm taking back my shame. It's mine, I earned it (or at least, I thought I did), and I'm not letting go of it until you explain yourself. And while you're at it, maybe throw in a little something for the emotional distress. A lifetime supply of chocolate wouldn't hurt.

In the meantime, I'm done with this whole "sinner" act. If I'm already forgiven, then it's time to start acting like it. No more self-deprecating humour, no more apologizing for my existence, and definitely no more shoulder pads.

Consider this my official declaration of spiritual independence. I'm taking the wheel, Jesus. And I'm driving this redemption train straight to Awesometown.

P.S. If you happen to see Paul around, tell him his letters were a bit confusing. Maybe next time he could use emojis. Just a thought. 😉


Addendum: The Now and Not Yet of Redemption

While the satirical tone of this piece highlights the frustration of living with a sense of unearned guilt, it also points to a profound theological truth: the tension between the "already" and the "not yet" of redemption.

Scripture clearly states that Christ's sacrifice on the cross secured our redemption:1

  • Ephesians 1:7: "In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's2 grace."3
  • Galatians 3:13: "Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us..."4
  • Colossians 1:14: "in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins."5

These verses, and many others, affirm that redemption was accomplished through Christ's death, a decisive act that bridged the gap between humanity and God.6

However, the Bible also emphasizes the role of faith in experiencing the fullness of that redemption:

  • Ephesians 2:8-9: "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God..."78
  • John 1:12: "Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—"910
  • Romans 10:9-10: "If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved."1112

These passages suggest that while redemption is a finished work, its transformative power is fully realized in our lives when we consciously embrace it through faith.

This aligns with the central theme of the satirical letter: the recognition that we were never truly guilty, that our inherent worthiness was established at the cross. The "wising up" moment is when we align our beliefs with this truth, releasing self-condemnation and stepping into the freedom that Christ secured for us.

It's a journey of moving from the "already" of redemption, accomplished at the cross, to the "not yet" of fully experiencing its transformative power in our lives. This journey requires faith, self-awareness, and a willingness to embrace the truth of our belovedness.

This addendum aims to provide a scriptural foundation for the satirical exploration of shame and redemption, inviting readers to delve deeper into the mystery of God's grace and the ongoing process of spiritual awakening.

#DearJesus #SpiritualIndependence #Shameless #NoMoreShoulderPads #RedemptionTrain #Awesometown #ConfusingLetters #EmojiBible #GiftCardFail #TakingBackMyShame

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